Confuscious once said “May you live in interesting times.” I think that’s as much a curse as a blessing, a vicious double edged sword that can cut as easy as protect. There’s something romantic about living in a simpler age with fewer concerns, though all such remembrances are hopelessly filtered through rose tinted glasses and I’m sure people in those simpler ages spent a lot of time worrying about getting enough to eat or plugging the hole in the thatched roof, so I’m not completely daft. I know that life was never easy and is not likely to get any easier despite the improvements we make. It also isn’t going to get harder, just different.
My own times are becoming more interesting (and here I use that term somewhat ironically) as I type this. For those of you who know me you might know that my wife has decided to leave me, that she announced this decision on Facebook of all fucking places and that I learned of this turn of events (not entirely unforeseen) in an email. Interesting times my ass. Now I am as much at fault for the breakdown of my marriage as she is, perhaps more, and I really wish her only the best, but at the moment I’m angry, hurt and not sure quite what to feel.
So now things get sticky. How do we tell our daughter, what do we tell our daughter. What kind of visitation rights is my wife going to give me, do I have to sue her for full access, it’s all a very large mess. My hope is that it resolves itself in time to a solution that provides maximum visitation for me and minimal irritation for my wife. That’s the dream, lets see what actually happens.
I had intended to post more, but frankly I don’t want to. I’ll post about completely meaningless stuff soon as I wrap my head around all of this and begin to have the impulse to do something else with my time. Sorry about Rabbit Hole day, if you were looking forward to what I might say, this sorta happened instead, so I unofficially declare Feb 27 2009 as my rabbit hole day, as hopefully a day I can start to climb out of the hole I have dug for myself and get on with my life.
You can’t be happy with anyone until you’re happy with yourself. Remember that, it’s true, and good advice to boot.